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    Canonfire :: View topic - Zagyg's by-laws
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    Zagyg's by-laws
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    Forum Moderator

    Joined: Feb 26, 2004
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    From: Ullinois

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    Thu Nov 17, 2005 7:55 am  
    Zagyg's by-laws

    The People's Constables of Greyhawk City is a position that holds great power for a lowly citizen and also brings much derision from those that are preyed upon. For 10gp a year one can have a license to be a walking, talking, fining machine. They handle the trivial offenses of the city that are beneath even the City Watch. Each constable often carries a leatherbound book that lists 5-100 additional bizarre by-laws enacted by Zagyg Yragerne that have yet to be repealed. All fines vary from 1cp to a maximum of 10sp.

    Five by-laws have been provided in Greyhawk:Folks, Feuds and Factions. Let's have some fun on here and add more of Zagyg's mad rules. There is really no limit to how many Zagyg created, so post away.

    1. Eating Kara fruit on a Starday when there is a 'Y' in the month.
    2. Fondling a duck or related waterfowl on the Processional (i.e. carrying it, but Zagyg preferred fondling in the wording of the law).
    3. Helping a halfling across the road (this can be construed as occuring when-ever one merely accompanies such a halfling).
    4. Conspring to belch in the direction of a scribe, sage, or other Learned Gentleman in a public place.
    5. Conveying vegetables in excess of one grommitt upon one's person in the presence of an elf or person with similarly pointed ears (the grommitt is an archaic unit of weight equal to roughly 6 oz.).
    -----------

    6. Failure to yield for and open a door for any woman wearing a hat, helmet or visible headware.
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    Thu Nov 17, 2005 8:34 am  

    7. Failure to salute purveyors of shrimp on the public highways on the second Moonday in Brewfest.
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    Thu Nov 17, 2005 8:40 am  

    8. Unlicensed production or distribution of villanelles within the City limits.
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    Thu Nov 17, 2005 12:52 pm  

    9. Punctuating without due care and attention.
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    From: Blue, The Pomarj (Lehigh Valley, PA)

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    Thu Nov 17, 2005 10:33 pm  

    10. Transporting live rodents (including familiars) during Brewfest by means other than in a sack tied with red string, and carried openly.
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    Fri Nov 18, 2005 12:57 am  

    11 Allowing, or causing to be allowed, the intoxication of a Dancing Bear which is not wearing a Ruff.
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    Sat Nov 19, 2005 4:45 am  

    Stepping on a crack in the presence of a mother or midwife (A law some think was based on a childish superstition).
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    Sat Nov 19, 2005 4:53 pm  

    13.) Numbering anything 13.
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    Mon Nov 21, 2005 2:36 pm  

    14) Singing the ballad "Red Road to Riftcanyon" accompanied by a wind instrument only, with no stringed instruments to back it up.

    15) Tripping over a loose cobblestone in front of a gnome father, without offering to help the gnome fix the broken pathway

    16) Serving or drinking alcoholic beverages that are "too cold" (this one is subject to a lot of interpretation, obviously)

    17) Taking the name of Boccob in vain, except if one is a priest of Boccob

    18) Fishing out of the Millstream between sunrise and high noon, except on Godsday

    19) Drinking halfling spirits without a special permit, unless one is in fact a halfling

    20) Throwing garbage into the streets, instead of waiting for it to be picked up by the Guild of Streetworkers (Okay, so maybe they aren't all absurd...)

    21) Refusing to eat roast cockatrice meat when ordered to by a tavern-keeper

    22) Taking the name of King Archbold I of Nyrond in vain

    23) Talking in the dwarven language in the High Marketplace

    24) Spitting into a rainbarrel without uttering a prayer of forgiveness to Xerbo

    25) Referring to the City of Greyhawk as the "Gem of the Flanaess" out loud (this term is meant only for the written word, not the oral speech)

    26) Mentioning the name of the Magister of Dyvers in public without also adding "he/she of the thousand adulterous flumphs" out loud three times afterwards.

    27) Screaming out loud during a rainy day

    28) Wearing red in the High Quarter on a Freeday

    29) Claiming that the Lordship of the Isles has a greater navy than the Hold of the Sea Princes out lout in public
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    Tue Nov 22, 2005 5:38 pm  

    30) Carrying more than five books on your person without hopping around on one foot while singing

    31) Preaching on Freeday without first bowing down and lapping ale off the cobblestones in the market square while uttering a prayer to Boccob

    32) Soiling your breeches while sober (soiling your breeches while drunk is permitted)

    33) Allowing an ugly woman to walk down Horseshoe Road without complimenting her on how she looks like a manticore's rear end

    34) Allowing a bird to defecate on you in public, unless it is dusk or later at night, except on Freeday, when fines are always levied regardless of the time

    35) Paying for wine drinks in taverns with electrum or copper pieces; only gold and silver may be used to pay for wine

    36) Wearing ring mail armor in the presence of a married woman in the Old City (in 3E, change this to a chain shirt)

    37) Using less than seven copper pieces at a time for any reason

    38) Not doffing your hat or helmet when the Master of the Union of Streetcleaners and Sewermen passes by in the streets
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    <div align="left">Going to war without Keoland is like going to war without a pipe organ.&nbsp; They both make a lot of noise and they're both a lot of dead weight, so what's the point in taking them along?&nbsp;</div>
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    Tue Nov 22, 2005 5:58 pm  

    Quote:
    29) Claiming that the Lordship of the Isles has a greater navy than the Hold of the Sea Princes out lout in public


    That would be anachronistic.
    Zagyg disappeared in 421 CY. The Sea Princes didn't form a government until 444 CY. Indeed, they didn't even start to "rise" until 434 CY.
    GreySage

    Joined: Aug 03, 2001
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    Tue Nov 22, 2005 9:11 pm  

    Bad Zagig! No more anachronisms! The spelljammer in your castle was bad enough.
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    Wed Nov 23, 2005 12:22 am  

    39) Utterance of the word Spelljammer in public. (99% of the public has no idea about spelljamming and if they did hear the word they might guess it has something to do with unlawfully dispelling someone else's magic. Zagig may in fact have made this one with the intention of keeping the 99% in the dark about his spelljamming activity.)

    That'll cost you 2 c.p. rasgon Cool
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    Wed Nov 23, 2005 7:46 pm  

    mortellan wrote:
    39) Utterance of the word Spelljammer in public. (99% of the public has no idea about spelljamming and if they did hear the word they might guess it has something to do with unlawfully dispelling someone else's magic. Zagig may in fact have made this one with the intention of keeping the 99% in the dark about his spelljamming activity.)

    That'll cost you 2 c.p. rasgon Cool


    Come now, everyone knows that Oerth is sealed against any and all attempts to reach it by spelljamming! The gods take specific steps to protect their beloved creation against the corrupting taints of industrialization, spelljamming, and excessive world-hopping...
    _________________
    <div align="left">Going to war without Keoland is like going to war without a pipe organ.&nbsp; They both make a lot of noise and they're both a lot of dead weight, so what's the point in taking them along?&nbsp;</div>
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    Fri Nov 25, 2005 4:30 am  

    If you want some real medieval by-laws from Merrie England check out this link:

    http://www.trytel.com/~tristan/towns/lynnlaws.html

    If you follow the link back - there's a great glossary of terms and by-laws for other English towns, as well as a series of very nice maps (which I linked to on the Shiboleth thread).
    Forum Moderator

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    Thu Dec 08, 2005 3:58 am  

    40) Staring at people who are eating through a tavern or restaurant window from the outside. (drooling gets you an extra 1cp charge. Not surprisingly beggars are most often cited for this by-law and then ask the Constable for a hand out to pay his fine.)
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    Thu Dec 08, 2005 8:22 am  

    41) Failing to fine the fortuneless. (Flogging might be more effective, but not as funny).
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